BDSM News, Articles, Reviews and all about
Live BDSM

To Switch Or Not To Switch

Thoughts on switching and switches is quite the scandalous subject. Some believe that within this lifestyle, one takes on either the role of the top or the bottom. That there is no way possible for one to switch from a sadist to a masochist at the blink of an eye. They say switching is comparable to those that are bisexual. Being that those who claim to be not one or the other, but in between, are just confused.

On the other side of the spectrum, people say it is healthy to act out both sides. The desires are there whether they are of the curious nature, or a craving.

I am a switch, and this is why I like who I am and what I do. Starting off, I will let you know where I am coming from. Growing up, I was very dominant in my friendships and relationships. There was also a very sadistic side to me. It always put a smile on my face that I was able to control people, and inflict pain. Again, I was young, and had no idea that there was a label, and better yet a community where this was accepted and understood.

About a year ago I met my first Mistress. A few months later I was collared to her. Before this, excluding the happenings as a child, I had only two experiences. One as a top, the other as a masochist. This was a big learning experience for me. I wanted to learn who I was and what I wanted. The first thing I had realized was that I wasn’t much of a submissive.

There is a time and a place for everything, and yes when I was restraint, I did as I was told. I had known before going into this that I had a very high pain tolerance. But, it wasn’t till I was with her, that I appreciated it, looked forward to it, and was able to understand it.

During this time, I also starting topping a friend. It was very nice to have an outlet for other things. This helped in more ways then one. I was getting off on the subMission he gave to me, and it was a release when I wasn’t getting played with.

This became more frequent, and my Mistress understood who I was and the desires I had. Which was very important for obvious reasons. After a few months of being collared to her, I decided I didn’t want to be her slave anymore. There were other things between us that I wanted to concentrate more on. I did remain her masochist, and we did play from time to time.



Since her, I have had one recent advance. There was some talk of me possibly being a personal slave to a top that I have a great deal of respect for. In the beginning it sounded like something to think about. I felt that I could learn a lot about being a top, and also as a submissive. Our interests were very similar. But I wanted to continue being who I was, and didn’t want to conform.

Maybe it’s me being selfish, but I enjoy every avenue for different reasons. There is nothing I like more than to see a bottom bound, taking what I give to them, and pushing them further than they thought they could go. Their reactions to fear and pain taking me further. Watching them grow from barely being able to take a mere flogging, to getting erect from a caning. Most of all, they are doing it for my pleasure, and I love breaking them of their once hard limits.

I also have my days where, I don’t want to be in control. Reveling in being able to sit back and relax, taking everything in. My mind only concentrating on what is being done to me. Sometimes in dire need of the pleasant tortures I have grown to love and crave.

I am very lucky to be able to act upon all of my desires. Perhaps I have more than others, or act out more than others care to. In my opinion, the ideal relationship is one where both switch from time to time. That statement also make me wonder. When a Dom/me finds a mate and decides to date, are they looking for one who is submissive, or a dominant? Do they want someone who is their equal, or someone that they can have total control over, considering those who look at this as a lifestyle. And if they choose a person with more dominant qualities lets say as a personality, do they switch roles from time to time. You already know my answer. If I was in a monogamous, I couldn’t live without both.

Every D/s relationship is different, because people are different. With my last Mistress, I had a very strong desire to switch with her. She didn’t, so hence it was one sided. There is another top that I play with however, that would like to feel the “other side of the whip” and would like me to be the one to take her there. I think as long as there is a lot of communicating, and the parties involved know their place, the relationship wouldn’t be affected by it.

When I venture out to a fetish party, or a club, I am dominant. If there comes a time where the tables are turned, it takes me a few moments to get adjusted. There has been an instance where I was getting my feet worshipped and a hand massage, and next thing I knew I had a top on either side of me making me worship them. That was very confusing. I was loving every minute of it don’t get me wrong, but I wasn’t able to enjoy what I was receiving as much as I normally would because of everything that was going on.

In closing, I am very happy with who I am. That I can live out all the fantasies that I have. I am very lucky to have the influences in my life that I do. Everyone has a right to their own opinion. And the above are mine. Hopefully there are many people out there that feel as I do, and those that don’t still respect it.



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

BDSM Tube

This is our brand new BDSM Tube website from BDSM Digest team. This tube is updated every day with new maledom, torture, bizarre, fetish videos. No any redirections, pop ups, etc - 100% to content! Clear surfing. Welcome to our BDSM Tube !
Most Popular
Meet LifeStyle People
If you are looking for BDSM partner CLICK HERE TO JOIN OUR BDSM COMMUNITY. Our BDSM database helps you connect and share with the BDSM people in your life. IT'S ABSOLUTELY FREE AND ANYONE CAN JOIN! No any credit card needed, no hidden fees, no charges. It means no money needed at all!
We Recommend
EXTRA PAIN - masochism website, covering all aspects of play piercing, painful sexual stimulation of female breast and genitals, pussy labia and clitoris piercing, nipples pricking, corset piercing, body mods and self stimulation with needles.
TOP PAIN - here you'll find girls being tortured and forced to orgasm in bizarre and painful ways. Extremely strong pics and movies to satisfy your evil lusts and desires. Very hard edgeplay! Real pain and moans of pleasure. It is a great site for those who love torture.
inCBT - the net's greatest site that is fully dedicated to the cock and balls torture and mods. This is the best place to see all kind of cock and balls torture, painful stimulations and modifications. Here you'll find all CBT methods you have been expecting.
Hot New Items
Zeus Electrosex Penis Bands. People like that these electro bands are made of a comfortable fabric that is elastic. This means it can be fitted on the penis shaft and around the cock and balls. Click for more info >
Strict Leather Flogger. This has about 18 strands, each 18.5 inches long and 0.5 inch wide. Even better, each leather fall has been cut at an angle for a tip with a bite. For stingy or thuddy flogging. Click for more info >
Ball Crusher Attachment for Ball Weights. Hit them where it hurts by crushing their family jewels. You can move the bar up and down to increase pressure or "crush effect" on their balls. Click for more info >
Inflatable Enema Plug. This toy has a rubber tube running through it so that fluids can pass through while it's inflated! This inflatable enema plug is built to last, imported from Europe.
Click for more info >
Wireless Vibrating Nipple Clamps. A powerful one touch vibrating wireless sex toy. These silver babies will shake practically anything you attach the clamps to. Just press the little button. Click for more info >
Find BDSM Partner

Must see!